Friday, April 17, 2009

Sunday, April 12, 2009

New Original!

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Friday, April 10, 2009

i refuse to be tainted.
I am not sure if that is even possible, though.
We will always be tainted and influenced by our given circumstances, but it doesn't have to ultimately define who we become.

I don't believe in blood relatives anymore. Blood has been nothing but a shackle not something that defines family and similar beliefs and morals. There shouldn't be any correlation between blood and family simply because you can't chose these people. They might as well be strangers. That's what it feels like sometimes. That's what family evolves into with time. Just like friendships and relationships, a family can grow apart as well. Why rule that out? It's all the same in the end.

I won't be tainted anymore. I won't expect anything anymore. I won't assume, discuss or try to understand anymore. Not with people. We are the most complex creatures for a reason. What gives us the arrogance to presume that we can attempt to understand another human being? We're always compelled to, though. It helps us believe that we, ourselves, can be understood.

The way I see it, it's a catch 22. We strive to be understood but fail to understand someone else. Will we ever completely get it? Will we want to? Will the fight be worth it?

What would we do with such knowledge?

Thursday, April 9, 2009

How am I doing?

This is my new years check list/resolution list from the beginning of the year. Let's see how well I am doing.

Let's see. If I were starting a new year what would I want to do differently?

* When you have no significant other in your life, don't pretend like you do. Don't drag your baggage towards someone else. You know the deal.

* Like everyone always says, go to the damn gym. Be active. Stop being lazy. Go get a six pack.. or something like it.

* No more blowing up for no apparent reason on your parents. Unless they're being immature. Be nice to your parents on the phone. You know you love them so stop being such a bitch.

* Keep up your correspondence. Keep good people around you.

* Continue loving yourself and everything about you.

* Ask for help more. Higher beings and people do care about you. That's what they're there for.

* Love everyone. Keep positive energy alive in your life and keep spewing it out every chance you get. No matter what.

For the most part, I am doing pretty damn well. Still some things to work on, but that's what keeps it exciting and hopeful. Some things I didn't even realize I was doing, or at least in correlation with this list. I guess I should be proud of myself and I am but there's no time to celebrate.... there's still a lot more living to do.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

if i could take it all back,

i would.